CHRISTIE, FRASER (1980 - ) My youngest cousin's problems can be attributed to various factors. Chief amongst them must be my aunt's advanced years at the time of his conception and the almost total absence of worthwhile qualities to be inherited from his father, a man whose insignificance precludes an individual entry in the glossary.

At the time of my aunt's reconciliation with Christie, her former fiance, previously abandoned on account of a terrifying premonition in which he stood before me in a suit of meat, she was still unbalanced by events that had led to my being ostracised and ridiculed on The People Who Saw Tomorrow television programme. With hindsight, it should have been incumbent upon the family to intervene. Freedom of choice might be an admirable concept, but how often do we allow the people we love blunder into ruinous commitments rather than risk the potential awkwardness of intervention? Had my aunt been offered the help and support of her family, I suspect she would never have succumbed to the wiles of nonentity. Sensing her vulnerability, though, and doubtless realising she was drugged, Christie remorselessly followed through with his game plan. Within months they were married in a tawdry and depressing Vegas office, a ceremony only attended by an elderly couple they'd met the previous day while on a sight-seeing tour of Vegas's 'attractions'.

I still argue that the circumstances of the wedding should render it null and void. If only I could say the same for her subsequent pregnancy! Studying the timescale, it's entirely possible that Fraser, the Prince of Numbskulls, was conceived in Los Vegas, the Numbskull capital of the known universe, a city inhabited by a transiet population of cheats, gawkers and convention lurkers.

My suspicion that my aunt was desperately trying to fill the void left by my absence was confirmed when she took Fraser, then aged seven, for analysis at the Gibson Institute, the same facility in which my own abilities had been confirmed years earlier. Since Fraser's infancy, she had desperately sought signs of enhanced intuition, a particularly difficult chore with a child who was five before he could 'intuit' the difference between a dog and a cat. The potential for humiliation was fulfilled when a series of clinical tests deemed him 'subnormal'.

 

Home

Glossary

Hamilton Live

Casebook

 

Contact