EARS, SPENCER'S – My brother's humourlessness precluded him from bonding with our Grandfather Sneddon. While Spencer enjoyed tormenting other children with jibes and fiendish contraptions, he bridled when the tables were turned. As a child, for example, he had disproportionately sized ears, something that became less pronounced as he grew older. Grandpa would gently tease him about this attribute. “You could save money on electricity and let Spencer listen to next door's radio”, he might say, or “why do you need a kite when you can just put some string round Spencer's ankle?” It wasn't as if Spencer was singled out as the butt of the joke. When Christine entered adolescence and erupted in spots, Grandpa referred to her as Madame Vesuvius, while the standard joke for me was I was an escapee from Easter Island, this being on account of my large head. Admittedly, there were occasions, particularly as Grandpa grew deafer and started to shout, when Christine failed to get the joke and either started to cry or stormed up the stairs to her room. I had no such problems and, consequently have always been able to laugh at myself. If someone wants to crack a gag about the size of my head, I'll immediately confound him with three more, all recalled from Grandpa's repertoire. The very mention of large ears, however, is still sufficient to cause my brother to bare his teeth. See Also LOMBROSO, CESARE

 

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